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Planning Your Valentines Day if You Are Not Part of a Couple

hearts

The cards and gifts have been in stores since right after Christmas and advertising is hitting the airwaves. The pressure is building for those in relationships to make Valentines Day a meaningful expression of how much you care for your significant other. Some look forward to this as a highlight of the year; others know it’s important for at least one of the couple and go along.

But what about the rest of us? The ones who are not in an intimate relationship? We can ignore it as much as we can. Or we can let it make us regret our singleness and go into a funk.

Or we can decide now to spend that day in a way that affirms us and others. What could that look like? I was fortunate a few years back to experience one such alternative. A friend invited 5 single women who didn’t know each other well to her home for dinner. We had great food and wine and shared our stories. It was a lovely, affirming evening.

Interestingly, when I googled “ what to do on Valentines Day if you’re single”, there are 40,200,000 results. Clearly there are a lot of people with ideas. A few are rather negative (like an anti-Valentine party), but most are interesting ideas. Here are a few of my favorites, in the categories of things to do by yourself and things to do with others:

SOLITARY ACTIVITIES

A self-care/spa night, including a bubble bath with candles and candy
Make yourself a fancy meal of foods you really love
Do something you’ve been putting off: something that will give you a sense of accomplishment when it’s done
Treat yourself to a bouquet of your favorite flowers
Buy yourself something you really want
Update your bucket list and get excited about your future plans

THINGS TO DO WITH OTHERS:

 Have a group spa night – facials, manicures, pedicures, massages
 Go to a movie with friends – anything but a romantic theme
 Have a potluck dinner with friends
 Host a sleepover/slumber party with silly movies and lots of junk food
 Brighten other people’s day by showing them you care – your parents, siblings, cousins, etc.
 Host a dance party with friends who love to let loose, dance and sing
 Have a Golden Girls–style gathering around the kitchen table with a few friends – ice cream and/or cheesecake and lots of conversation – serious, silly, whatever happens
 Have a game night – board games + whatever makes you and your friends laugh
 Have a Secret Valentine exchange (a variation of Secret Santa) with other single friends, including parameters on cost, etc.

A simple reminder – stay off social media if seeing the posts of couples having fun bums you.

And there’s always the alternative of simply ignoring the whole thing. It’s a weeknight; do what you usually do if possible. If not, stay home and read or watch television. No biggy.