Fear is a strong word. Sometimes we can admit we are fearful of things. Other times we couch it in terms like concern, trepidation, unease, apprehensiveness, or dread. Whatever you name it, there are plenty of things that may fall into these categories in this year of uncertainty and change.
It may have to do with employment and income, care of children and their educational arrangements, health and recovery, family relationships affected by limitations of interaction and more. You can certainly identify some things that have been upset, turned upside down, lost or threatened during this time of pandemic. Some of those cause us to be fearful of what is ahead.
Given our reality, fear and its related emotions are a given for most of us. Though we can’t see the future, or really plan for things very well as things continue to change, we can explore ways to face and manage those emotions and all that flow from them.
Here are four tips for facing your fears and some resources that can provide more practical direction.
Break it down and take baby steps
Identify one area of life where you have fears. Break it down to specific things you can address. This can be most easily done by doing some writing or journaling. You may want to start by listing all the things that cause you concern and then choosing one area that you can dig into more. Realize that getting started on how you think about this and what the possibilities are is a significant step.
Take steps to get support or assistance – you don’t have to do this alone
If you aren’t already sharing and discussing your concerns and fears with others – family, friends, colleagues – identify people to fill this role. In some instances, professional advice from a coach, mentor or other appropriate person may be most helpful. Make sure that these are more than gripe sessions, although there is always a role and a time for venting. Then move on.
Accentuate the positive
This can truly be a challenge some days, can’t it? Anything you do to avoid getting into a negativity spiral which tends to increase a sense of helplessness and paralysis is critically important. Actively identify what’s going right in your life and what positive effects and awareness has come with this altered reality. Start or continue a gratitude journal which can remind you when you have those down days.
Look toward the future with a hopeful, positive mindset and expectation. Although you may not know what it will look like or how to get there, trust that things will work out. It may be helpful to look up some stories about people who came through challenging times and get inspiration and ideas from them.
Take control of the story
Make a decision that you are and will be brave and confident through these times. As the negative things spin around in your head at times, take action to not let them take control. A helpful technique is to make a list of those thoughts and then for each one, write a positive to replace it. Focus on your skills, strengths and potential to shift your thoughts.
These four things can make a difference in how you continue through these times when very few things are “normal” and we don’t know how things will evolve. In addition, I encourage you to check these resources for dealing with fear (and all its related emotions).
The Fear Book is described this way by a reviewer: “One of the best books ever written. I never get tired of it. Perfect for all ages. Extremely helpful. Puts real therapeutic knowledge into simple language to understand. Very motivating, positive, and calming. You will not be disappointed with this book!”
Feel the Fear…and Do It Anyway is described this way by a reviewer: “I learned that fear stops us from becoming greater versions of ourselves, and the importance of not necessarily becoming fearless, but to change your mindset and telling yourself it’s okay to be afraid, be compassionate with yourself, and replace the negative inner voice with a positive one….”
Finally, here is a great blog post by Henri you may also find helpful: “33 Powerful Ways of Overcoming Fear … Right Now” which has been updated just a couple of months ago. https://www.wakeupcloud.com/overcoming-fear/
These are challenging times and we will make it through by encouraging and assisting each other through it. May these thoughts and resources be helpful to you.