Using Liminal Space to Create the Next Reality in America

unknown, liminal, tunnel“It would be difficult to exist in this time of global crisis and not feel caught between at least two worlds—the one we knew and the one to come. Our consciousness and that of future generations has been changed. We cannot put the genie back in the bottle.”

Those words by Richard Rohr, author and theologian, articulate something many of us are feeling. It has been several months (for lots of us) of being under “stay at home” orders  or other restrictions so that the infection rates can be reduced and our health care systems can be likely to handle what comes in the long haul. The more that we hear about what is to come, the more caught between we can feel.

There is a word that describes this position.  Not a common word, but one that grasps the essence of what lots of people are feeling.  We are in liminal space. The word liminal comes from the Latin word ‘limen’, meaning threshold – any point or place of entering or beginning. A liminal space is the time between the ‘what was’ and the ‘next.’ It is a place of transition, a season of waiting, and not knowing.

Richard Rohr addresses this directly: “This global pandemic we now face is an example of an immense, collective liminal space. The very vulnerability and openness of liminal space allows room for something genuinely new to happen. We are empty and receptive—erased tablets waiting for new words. Liminal space is where we are most teachable, often because we are most humbled. Liminality keeps us in an ongoing state of …calling so-called normalcy into creative question.”

I see this perspective as helpful in providing a framework for the days ahead. The most significant things we can do are to use this time to examine what opportunities this massive disruption of our “normal” can offer.

What about our personal normal of the past do we consider important and life-giving to ourselves and others in our immediate circle? What things would we like to modify, change significantly or eliminate?

Then there are the larger questions within our communities and country. This crisis has revealed (to some) and amplified (to others) some of the ways in which our country is not life-giving and nurturing to everyone. The obvious examples are these:

1) the disproportionately high infection and death rates among our African American, Latino, and indigenous groups

2) the high infection and death rates in long term care facilities – nursing homes, assist living facilities, etc.

3) the dire effects of lack of health care services, facilities and insurance among people in rural America as well as among the communities of color mentioned above.

As we view these things – among others – in this liminal space, what do we want to do about them? There is so much pressure to “get us back to normal” which is not going to happen quickly. In fact, it will never be the normal we had several months ago. There are ways in which that is good. To simply return to what was is not in the interest of many, many Americans.

We are having an extended time to look at how we will live, work, educate our children and ourselves, take care of the vulnerable, and make our country a more just and lifegiving place for all of our fellow citizens.

Liminal space is where all transformation takes place. We are on a threshold and we will be here for a while. How will we use this time and space to ponder the next phase for ourselves, the organizations of which we are a part, our communities, and our country?

Journaling is an incredible and flexible tool and has so much to offer during times like these. If you would like to explore ways to use journaling, check out my free online course that introduces several uses: https://carolbrusegar.com/journaling-explore-the-possibilities-with-my-free-ecourse/

 

 

 

 

 

The Art of Allowing – When Everything is Topsy-Turvy

hands+candle2020 so far has been topsy-turvy for all of us. So much has changed, so much is uncertain. For some of us it’s disastrous in terms of income, housing and of course health. There is a wide spectrum between those most severely impacted and those who are affected in less extreme ways. But every single person is affected. As someone noted, “We’re all in the same storm, but we’re not in the same boat.”

We all intellectually understand that life is going to teach us some tough lessons. No one escapes sickness and death. Everyone is going to have challenges in their life to mold them into what they can become.

When we are faced with upheaval, we generally have two major approaches most of us take: the default of fighting and raging against it – or attempting to ride it out as best you can, knowing that there is an ebb and flow to life and that this situation is temporary, no matter how it feels right now. The latter usually involves letting go of the illusion of any control and working with what you’ve got.

Letting go of control is anathema to many of us; Americans seem to be especially afflicted with an illusion or obsession of independence. It has become part of the cultural struggle – for example, no government official can tell me I have to wear a mask vs. our actions affect others and for the good of all, I will wear a mask.

It is encouraging to hear and read about people who are using this unexpected time in our lives to do the proverbial “making lemonade out of lemons.” As we find ourselves in situations that make us pucker up at the very least, many are seeing ways to use this opportunity to reflect on what was normal. Was that normal optimum? How can we do things in ways that are more family-affirming and better for personal health and wellness? People are creating things that better meet their needs and desires now. What impact will that have as we move through and beyond the immediate crisis?

What is Your Mindset?

Our mindset is key to how we handle any situation. Some people have a foundational belief that life is one big struggle after the next, and then you die. They might feel like they are always unlucky or accident prone. Our current situation just reinforces that. Others see life as basically good with some rough spots that they will go through and probably gain knowledge from. From both positions, the expectation nearly always is that person’s reality. What we focus on, we will attract more of.

Most of the time we don’t even realize our mindset. We live on autopilot and by living that way, stay in the same rut we’ve come to expect. Cultivating and reinforcing a mindset of basic good is a key part of continuing to go through this pandemic year and beyond. By seeing negative events in your life as flexible, short term situations, you can more easily move on. Those who view situations as being temporary, will be more likely to see the same situation as a speed bump in life’s rear-view mirror. That mindset leads to flexibility and adaptation – two outlooks that help people recover from bad situations.

Create an allowing practice

If you find yourself struggling to maintain that belief that things will get better and we will get through whatever it is we face, creating an allowing practice and using it daily can be of help.

This is a simple practice you can do daily when you put your attention and awareness on allowing rather than resisting. Think of:

  • accepting things as they are;
  • identifying, receiving and celebrating the positives, surprises and gifts in the current situation;
  • trusting things will ultimately work out.

Taking a short time each day to do this can release some of the intense responsibility you feel for all the outcomes of everything facing you and your family. It may also release some of the anger (even rage) about the difficulties of these days. Give it a try!

Are You A Worrier? Managing Worry In Difficult Times, Part II

worry 4

 “Worrying is carrying tomorrow’s load with today’s strength – carrying two days at once. It is moving into tomorrow ahead of time. Worrying doesn’t empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.”  ― Corrie Ten Boom

Many of us consider worry a given.  It may be, as a friend often says, “Worrying about my children and grandchildren is a mother’s job. It’s what we do.” Or it may be accepting it as part of what your parents imprinted upon you as worrying was a strong part of their mode of living. “I just can’t help myself.”  I personally reject those characterizations.

Taking Control of Your Worries

While it may not seem like it, it is possible to take control of your worries. With a little patience, practice and persistence, you can become calmer and learn how to take control over your worry as soon as it starts to occur.

Here are some of the best ways to do that.

Create a plan

Having a plan in place to combat toxic worry can be very helpful. For this, you’ll need to write down all of the things you’re worried about. I suggested doing that in the previous post, http://carolbrusegar.com/managing-worry-in-difficult-times-part-i/.

Then consider what kind of worry each is – generalized, perfection, fear of making  mistakes, social or post-traumatic stress worry. (These are described in Part I.) Knowing this will help you in the next steps.

Once you have your worry list, you can start to think of ways to reduce them. How can you eliminate the worry and what steps will you need to take? Creating a little to-do list of things you can do to reduce the worry, and then ticking off the tasks as you do them will help you feel more in control of the situation.

Arm yourself with facts

You’ll often find that toxic worry stems from either a lack of information or the wrong information. You could be worrying about something that you don’t fully understand or have adequate information about.

So, if you want to take control, arm yourself with facts. Learn everything you can about the thing you’re worrying about. The more knowledgeable you are about the thing you’re worried about, the less you’ll actually worry.

One of the most difficult things about these times is that there either aren’t “facts” available or there are differing opinions which people claim as facts. Perhaps part of your worry is how to deal with these discrepancies as you make personal decisions. So taking steps to put boundaries around your worries can be helpful.

Allow yourself small worry windows

It may not be possible, or even healthy, to never worry about anything. Particularly in times of great uncertainty, there can be a role for non-obsessive worry. Make time to acknowledge your worries. Set aside small windows of time each day and train your mind to worry only during these designated periods.

Then, once the time is up, you aim to forget about your worries for the rest of the day. This allows you to use your time to take some action or just be in the present and enjoy what is. This creates a much healthier balance, ensuring you aren’t burying your head in the sand, but you also aren’t letting your worries take over.

Challenge your thoughts

When you start to notice those negative worrying thoughts, challenge them. It’s common to make your worries appear worse than they actually are – jumping to the worst-case scenario. Most of us are really good at asking what if this or that bad thing happened and dwelling on that.

Leave yourself open to the possibility that things won’t be as bad as you think. Identify healthier, more positive ways to look at the situation. Look at what the probability of the worst-case scenario happening is. Also look at whether the worry is helping or hindering the situation. If it isn’t helping, why are you giving it the power to control you?

Interrupt the cycle

Sometimes, you just have to interrupt the cycle. When you catch yourself worrying over something, turn your focus to something else.

Four things many people use effectively are exercise, meditation, deep breathing, listening to particular kinds of music, and reading.

Overall, toxic worry can have a significant impact on your health and wellbeing. However, there are ways to tackle and control it. The above are some of the best things you can try to take control over toxic worry and start living a happier, healthier life, even in these times of uncertainty.

You will find options of music for relaxation and meditation that can help interrupt the cycle and manage your worry here: Music for Relaxation and Meditation

https://amzn.to/3eeJtST

ARE YOU A WORRIER? MANAGING WORRY IN DIFFICULT TIMES, PART I

Are You a Worrier

Do you find yourself worrying a lot these days? It may be related to the broad effects of the pandemic or to the specific effects on our personal lives. When there is great uncertainty, worry multiplies.

Worry is a word that we use a lot. Let’s use this definition as a base: to give way to anxiety or unease; allow one’s mind to dwell on difficulty or troubles.  As a noun, worry is a state of anxiety and uncertainty over actual or potential problems and it can be toxic, affecting every part of your life.

Why does it happen?

There are a lot of things that can contribute to toxic worrying. The most common include:

  • Feeling vulnerable and insecure
  • Lack of control
  • Negativity breeds negativity
  • Anxiety disorders
  • Stress

That pretty much describes our situation today, in my opinion. Although we use one term, there are different types of worrying. Which one(s) affect you most?

Generalized toxic worry

With generalized toxic worry, there is no one cause. You’ll worry about everything from finances to relationships. The worry is continuous, and it really impacts your day to day life.

This is actually the most common type of worry. You’ll find it hard to get a break from the worry and anxiety, and there may be no particular trigger.

Perfection worry

None of us are perfect. However, those suffering with perfection worry tend to feel like they should be. You’ll scrutinize everything you do, berating yourself for not doing better.

It could be perfectionism at work, at home or within your social circle. We all want to manage the various aspects of surviving in these times with perfection but there are new challenges with work, home, school and more. While a little perfectionism can actually be healthy, too much quickly becomes toxic.

Fear of making mistakes

Fear is a common emotion, but it can easily take over your life. This is especially true when you’re scared of making mistakes.

The truth is, we all make mistakes and it is how we learn from them that makes us better ourselves. In a time when so much is changing and there are no models or blueprints to use, this can be a particularly common type of worry. It’s important that we do our best in each situation and know there will be mistakes made as we try to find our way.

Social worry

With social worry, you’ll typically find yourself worrying about how you come across in social situations. You’ll feel uncomfortable around people and fear being judged by those around you.

There are different levels of severity with social worry. It may simply make you feel uncomfortable and anxious while you’re out. Or, in severe cases it could make you avoid social situations completely.

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

In some cases, toxic worry can be related to post-traumatic stress disorder. While this is the least common type of toxic worrying, it can still be a potential cause. With this type of toxic worrying, it occurs after a stressful and traumatic experience. These days in a pandemic could be triggering some previous time – an accident you’ve suffered, a time of economic crisis, or a death of a loved one for example. To avoid going through the experience again, your mind starts to worry more. Post-traumatic stress disorder is a serious condition which may call for professional treatment.

Why recognizing your toxic worry is important

The different types of toxic worry have a slightly different impact on your health and well-being. They also require a different form of management. Some will require professional help, while others can be managed successfully by yourself.

It is only after you have identified the type of toxic worry you’re experiencing that you can work on how to get past it. Toxic worrying can have a debilitating impact on your life.

What kind of worry are you experiencing?

A first step is to write down all the things that you are worrying about, which type of toxic worry it is, and how frequently it is happening. Write a bit more about each one to understand it better. In an upcoming post, I will suggest some ways to manage worry in your life.

If you are ready to dig into this more right now, consider this book:

The Worry Cure, Seven Steps to Stop Worry From Stopping You

 

Dealing With Our Fear In Times of Great Uncertainty

Fear and uncertaintyFear is a strong word. Sometimes we can admit we are fearful of things. Other times we couch it in terms like concern, trepidation, unease, apprehensiveness, or dread. Whatever you name it, there are plenty of things that may fall into these categories in this year of uncertainty and change.

It may have to do with employment and income, care of children and their educational arrangements, health and recovery, family relationships affected by limitations of interaction and more. You can certainly identify some things that have been upset, turned upside down, lost or threatened during this time of pandemic. Some of those cause us to be fearful of what is ahead.

Given our reality, fear and its related emotions are a given for most of us. Though we can’t see the future, or really plan for things very well as things continue to change, we can explore ways to face and manage those emotions and all that flow from them.

Here are four tips for facing your fears and some resources that can provide more practical direction.

Break it down and take baby steps

Identify one area of life where you have fears. Break it down to specific things you can address. This can be most easily done by doing some writing or journaling. You may want to start by listing all the things that cause you concern and then choosing one area that you can dig into more. Realize that getting started on how you think about this and what the possibilities are is a significant step.

Take steps to get support or assistance – you don’t have to do this alone

If you aren’t already sharing and discussing your concerns and fears with others – family, friends, colleagues – identify people to fill this role. In some instances, professional advice from a coach, mentor or other appropriate person may be most helpful. Make sure that these are more than gripe sessions, although there is always a role and a time for venting. Then move on.

Accentuate the positive

This can truly be a challenge some days, can’t it? Anything you do to avoid getting into a negativity spiral which tends to increase a sense of helplessness and paralysis is critically important. Actively identify what’s going right in your life and what positive effects and awareness has come with this altered reality. Start or continue a gratitude journal which can remind you when you have those down days.

Look toward the future with a hopeful, positive mindset and expectation. Although you may not know what it will look like or how to get there, trust that things will work out. It may be helpful to look up some stories about people who came through challenging times and get inspiration and ideas from them.

Take control of the story

Make a decision that you are and will be brave and confident through these times. As the negative things spin around in your head at times, take action to not let them take control. A helpful technique is to make a list of those thoughts and then for each one, write a positive to replace it. Focus on your skills, strengths and potential to shift your thoughts.

These four things can make a difference in how you continue through these times when very few things are “normal” and we don’t know how things will evolve. In addition, I encourage you to check these resources for dealing with fear (and all its related emotions).

The Fear Book is described this way by a reviewer: “One of the best books ever written. I never get tired of it. Perfect for all ages. Extremely helpful. Puts real therapeutic knowledge into simple language to understand. Very motivating, positive, and calming. You will not be disappointed with this book!”

https://amzn.to/37TN7QF

Feel the Fear…and Do It Anyway is described this way by a reviewer: “I learned that fear stops us from becoming greater versions of ourselves, and the importance of not necessarily becoming fearless, but to change your mindset and telling yourself it’s okay to be afraid, be compassionate with yourself, and replace the negative inner voice with a positive one….”

Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway®: Dynamic techniques for turning Fear, Indecision and Anger into Power, Action and Love by [Susan Jeffers Ph.D.]

https://amzn.to/3erDZFf

Finally, here is a great blog post by Henri you may also find helpful: “33 Powerful Ways of Overcoming Fear … Right Now” which has been updated just a couple of months ago.  https://www.wakeupcloud.com/overcoming-fear/

These are challenging times and we will make it through by encouraging and assisting each other through it. May these thoughts and resources be helpful to you.

Nature and Fractals Reduce Overwhelm and Stress

Fractal 1Many of us have times of overwhelm and stress during these times of uncertainty. It may be only sporadic or more pervasive. Overwhelm is the consistent state of feeling in over your head, overburdened, and unable to sustain manageable control over the various expectations in your day. It has a domino effect. Usually beginning in one area of life, it can extend to all areas as the body begins to fatigue from the chronic stress.

If your overwhelm becomes more than occasional, you may notice that you develop chronic headaches, stomach aches, body aches, and can’t seem to get enough sleep.  These are symptoms of adrenal fatigue and your body’s natural reaction to chronic stressors.

Mother Nature’s Surprising Antidote to Stress and Overwhelm

As we continue forward, it’s helpful to expand our strategies for coping with the stress, not only of the immediate but of all the unknowns of the coming months. Most of us find that being out in nature is one of those strategies. What is it about a stroll in the woods or going for a walk along a country lane that seems to bring a sense of inner peace?

Or perhaps walking barefoot on the beach, watching the waves and collecting seashells brings much joy into your heart.

Is it simply because you’ve “got back to nature”? Is it because you are outside breathing fresh air for a change instead of being stuck in the stress box you call your office?

Those are all true, but there is another perfectly natural one-word explanation for why you feel so calm and content. FRACTALS! They’re all around you, wherever you look.  They are even inside you – your body is full of fractals: Your veins, nerves and even your bronchial tree is fractal.

What are fractals and how do they reduce stress?

The simplest way to describe a fractal is a pattern that repeats itself over a decreasing scale.

Take trees for example. The branches are copies of the trunk, only smaller.  The smaller branches are copies of the larger branches they stemmed from. Twigs are copies of the smaller branches. Each part of the tree is a smaller copy of the whole.

If you were to look at a snowflake under a magnifying glass before it melts, you would see that it is made up of the same complex repeating pattern.

Since the beginning of humanity, we have been surrounded by fractals.  They are Mother Nature’s building blocks and our evolutionary comfort zone. More examples include fiddlehead ferns, broccoli, aloe vera plants, crystals, angelica flowers (and many others), lightning, and seashells.

How do you use fractals for stress relief?

  • Don’t spend so much time inside. Get outside more. Stand and watch the clouds, or sit on a park bench and watch the trees swaying in the breeze for a few minutes. Do some deep breathing and fill your lungs with fresh air while you’re there. You’ll soon feel your stress melting away like a snowflake that lands on a surface.
  • If you can’t go outside when you feel your stress levels rising, just look out the window for a few minutes instead.
  • Add fractals to your indoor environment and take breaks to view and appreciate them and their soothing patterns.  These can be houseplants like fractal succulents or aloe vera. They can be seashells that have those patterns.
  • Fractal art and other man-made fractals, according to research, are equally effective. You can just as quickly lower your stress levels by watching a fractal screensaver on your computer for a few seconds or watch a video like this one:
  • Fractal Coloring Books can serve this purpose, too. These are distinct from mandalas and are labeled as such. Here are some examples:

Yes, it might seem incredible, but studies have shown the calming effects that fractals have on the mind really do take effect very quickly.

Fractals are all around, hiding in plain sight. Focus on them and relieve your stress and overwhelm!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Journaling Through Difficult Times-Get Your Free Downloadable Journal Now

journaling

You may be in one of these groups: a committed journaler, a dabbler (one who occasionally or sporadically journals), one who has sworn off such pursuits, or open to ideas about using a tool that is amazingly flexible.

Regardless of whether you can identify with one of those, or are in another place, I invite you now to seriously consider  journaling at this particular time in our lives. It can have immediate benefits like giving you more clarity as you reflect. It can also be therapeutic. Particularly in this quickly changing times, our heads are filled with so many thoughts, questions and feelings. Taking a little time to sit down and reflect on all that can be extremely helpful.

Many, if not all of us have elevated stress and anxiety as we try to figure out the logistics of the reality we have been forced into. Writing in a journal will help us figure out what some specific stressors are, what triggers the anxiety and think about how we can reduce and share them. We can also use a journal to consciously list what we are grateful for in the midst of all this.

Beyond these immediate benefits, our journals will be a great treasure as we look back years from now at our personal thoughts and experiences. These will also provide a window into what we went through for our children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren in future years.

Will you join me in journaling from your personal viewpoint what this CoVid-19 virus pandemic means to you, how it is affecting your life, what thoughts you have? 

In a matter of a few weeks, our whole country and our individual lives have changed. How did the changes evolve for you? Starting now, we can look back on the last weeks and record how the reality began to enter into our consciousness and how it grew. We can reflect on how we perceived the process from that point to now. And from this point forward, we can record daily or near-daily experiences and reflections. At this point, we have no idea how long this will last and how things will change.

To facilitate this, I offer you a free downloadable and printable journal. You can print additional pages as you wish. I also invite you to join this Facebook Group:  http://carolbrusegar.com/Journaling-a-Tool-For-Life

In the journal, I provide some questions/prompts that can help you zero in on your experiences and questions.  So that it is most flexible, those questions/prompts will be in list form and you can write about whichever seems most useful on any given day. Or perhaps you just want to do daily reflections as you go along.

In the Facebook group, I hope that we can share some of what we are writing, inspire others to explore in additional ways, and support each other.

Here’s your link to the direct download: http://carolbrusegar.com/Journaling-Through-Crisis

 

 

 

Journaling: Explore the Possibilities With My Free eCourse

prismAre you a journaling devotee, beginner, skeptic, or critic? Have you actually tried it or just been aware of it around you? What are your opinions about the practice?

I have come to see journaling something like a prism – a tool that can provide clarification by helping us focus on particular aspects of our lives. Depending on what we wish to look at, there are different styles and techniques to explore.

Journaling has been a way for people to express themselves for centuries. Its current popularity can be seen in a Google search for “journaling” that returned 47,300,000 results!! This clearly indicates that there a lot of people providing lots of information on this broad topic which has many subtopics and categories.

Perhaps you are wondering what all the fuss is about and would like an overview to see what the possibilities are for you. Or perhaps you have journaled and are interested in expanding your view of the varieties of journaling.

I invite you to sign up for my brand new free ecourse, “Journaling: a Prism to Clarify and Enhance All Aspects of Life.”  It is an overview that can give you some new options for using journaling. It includes some free sample journals to try.

Go here to sign up and you will receive it via email in 7 parts over 14 days. You will also have access to a Facebook group on the topic. http://carolbrusegar.com/journaling-prism-to-clarify-and-enhance-life/

Your first lesson will be available immediately upon signing up.

(I previously wrote about 4 major purposes to journal here: https://carolbrusegar.com/journaling-as-a-tool/  I talked about personal growth, self-discovery, gathering ideas and brainstorming solutions, and capturing life experiences. Journaling provides a great tool for these things.)

Do You Want To Be a Super Learner?

lifelong learningWe all agree that things continue to change, and it seems at an accelerating pace. Keeping up with it all can be a challenge. Whether technology changes, health and wellness advice, the businesses and shops within our local area, or any number of additional things, new things are available to us all the time.

Sometimes it’s just so much, and we hear those voices saying ‘you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.’ But those are old tapes and they do us a disservice. In fact, some of the new things available to us are insights about and approaches to our lifelong ability to learn and grow. At every stage of life, we make choices about what is worth our time learning, based on what will benefit or enrich us most.

No, at this age I’m not interested in learning to skateboard or do mathematical calculations. There are other things that I am simply interested in learning about or learning to do and if I prioritize them and figure out how, I can learn them. Is that how you approach learning new things?

Thomas Oppong wrote an extremely helpful article, “6 Habits of Super Learners, Learn Any Skill Deeply and Quickly.” I think you may find them interesting.

Oppong’s first habit: super learners read a lot. He says, “In a world where information is the new currency, reading is the best source of continuous learning, knowledge and acquiring more of that currency.” As an avid reader, I am delighted to see this as number one.  The hard part of this – the overwhelming amount of new information available every day. That’s why it’s helpful to be connected with networks and individuals who offer some recommendations that are pertinent to us. It may be an online group or website or people who share your values and interests. Where do you find that input?

Adopting a growth mindset is another of Oppong’s habits.  A growth mindset is the opposite of a fixed mindset and it allows us to be open, curious and always ready to learn. This is especially important as we age. It can be too easy to slip into a pattern of assessing possibilities in the framework of our past rather than future opportunities of thought and action. Dr. Carol Dweck’s book, Mindset, the New Psychology of Success, provides much valuable information about how we can have a growth mindset.  Importantly, her approach is broad. When she speaks of success, it is in any part or endeavor of life.

The final tip I will share from the article is that super learners teach others what they know. As the author states, “Teaching others what you know is one of the most effective ways to learn, remember and recall new information. Psychologists call it the ‘retrieval practice.’” I expect that many of us have had that experience, formally or informally. It is a process of both deepening our understanding and putting it into action.

Increasing our super learning habits and skills can pay off in many ways.  How about starting with deciding what you would like to learn and determine what you need to be and do to make that a reality?

3-Part Bucket List & JournalPerhaps you are not sure what you want to learn right now.  Here’s a way to get started – a 3-Part Bucket List and Journal. With this 3-Part Bucket List, you will divide your desires into three main categories: 1) things I want to learn about, 2) things I want to learn to do, and 3) things I want to do. In addition there are goal setting/planning sheets, journaling pages and doodling/sketching/mind mapping pages.

3-Part Bucket List & Journal

 

You can find Oppong’s full article at https://medium.com/personal-growth/6-habits-of-super-learners-63d466a254fd

In addition, he has a variety of books on Amazon, which you can find here:  https://amzn.to/39szzf7

Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol S. Dweck is available here: https://amzn.to/32H90A2

Tips For Reinvention From an Unusual Source

footprints

 

Reinventing or transforming life after age 50 is one of my passions.  I gained a helpful perspective from  an article written by one who has reinvented himself many times to the extreme. Reading about the range of major reinventions this author has made encourages me to think bigger about the possibilities for myself and others.  Jack Barsky has made transformations that very few make – or would want to make. But the principles are interesting.

You may have seen Barsky on 60 Minutes, CNN, Fox, or MSNBC or read his book, Deep Undercover. Barsky was born in Germany, was a chemistry professor for years, was recruited by the KGB, spent 10 years in the United States spying for the Russians during the Cold War, and ended up a United States citizen and information technology executive.

Based on the major shifts as well as a number of fictional characters he became in his travels, Barsky offers 9 Tips for Mastering the Art of Reinvention – behaviors we might adopt as we are reinventing ourselves at any stage of life.

Two that stand out for me are Take a Self Inventory and Work on Your Soft Skills.  Barsky’s recommended Self Inventory is to focus on talents and abilities you have, regardless of whether or not you have ever used them to earn a living. Often we fail to recognize the skills and abilities we have developed and used in volunteer work and other activities. These may be transferable or adaptable to various other settings.

Take 15 minutes or so to write down the things you have done outside your major work experience – side jobs, volunteer work, hobbies. Then list what you did and learned in them. You may be astounded at your list.

Working on Your Soft Skills is a logical next step to the Self Inventory.  Soft skills are defined as “personal attributes that enable someone to interact effectively and harmoniously with other people.” The list of soft skills can vary; here is a representative one: effective communication skills, teamwork, dependability, adaptability, conflict resolution, flexibility, leadership, problem-solving, research, creativity, work ethic, integrity. We can demonstrate and develop these skills in all aspects of our lives. Take one of these and think of the ways you demonstrate it in work settings, volunteer work, family, friendship circles, etc. This exercise may broaden your perspective of skills you have and want to expand as well as ways to apply them in new ways as you reinvent your life.

Barsky wraps up his nine tips by stating “power is having options.”  This really summarizes his message: “Fulfillment … requires an attitude of life-long learning and a willingness to periodically shed the old skin and step into a new self.”

You can read the entire article here:

9 Tips for Mastering the Art of Reinvention

NOTE: You may find Barsky’s book Deep Uncover interesting. An Amazon review describes it this way: “Equal parts memoir, spycraft guide, and historical document, Deep Undercover perfectly describes the crippling insularity of the spy’s life.”  If you are interested in his book, you can find it here:

Deep Undercover