Category: Personal Development

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How to Develop and Nurture Motivation

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incrrease motivationDo you consider yourself highly motivated in at least some areas of your life? For many of us, including myself, motivation waivers. It isn’t consistent over time or in various parts of life. That’s pretty common. We can develop and nurture motivation when we learn more about motivation and practice certain helpful things.

You know a highly motivated person when you see one. They seem indefatigable (what a great word: persisting tirelessly) in the face of a challenge and possessive of more energy than a pink bunny with a drum.

But what exactly are the character traits that help them stay that way?

  1. Purpose. Highly motivated people are able comprehend and internalize the bigger picture. They see how their work fits into the whole, and therefore don’t start feeling like the smaller components of the journey are meaningless.
  2. Optimism. With a positive vision of what could be in the future, motivated people gain energy to go about their work towards the happy outcome they envision.
  3. Self-Esteem. It’s hard to do anything when you don’t feel like you can do it. But motivated people know their strengths, and they believe in themselves.
  4. Bravery. Motivated people delight in taking on new challenges, and they don’t back down from risk. They’re not afraid to take chances, get mistakes, and get messy—just like the Ms. Frizzle, the teacher on the Magic School Bus series. Best Miss Frizzle Quotes From The Magic School Bus (dailytimepoems.com)
  5. Energy. Motivated people have the requisite energy—mental, physical, or emotional—to move forward with their plan and fight the good fight.
  6. Persistence. People with high levels of motivation don’t just give up when the going gets tough. They buckle down and stick to their guns.
  7. Perspective. Highly motivated people don’t get it twisted with the small stuff. They know how to sort through life’s myriad concerns and ignore the little things that could pull them off course.
  8. Reflection. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson, an old adage goes, and motivated people get that. While bravery, energy, and persistence are some of their sterling qualities, that doesn’t mean they make stupid choices. Motivated people reflect on the process and move forward with intelligence and strategy.
  9. Humility. Motivated people also have perspective on their own strengths and weaknesses. An arrogant person will quickly run up against a wall again and again as opposing egos clash with their quest. By contrast, a humble person will have an easier time carrying out their plan, taking feedback, and adjusting course as necessary. They’re not offended—their eyes are on the prize, and they’ll take the help they need to get there.
  10. Celebration. Motivated people enjoy success and they celebrate it. It’s not about throwing it in other people’s faces, but about appreciating the hard work just done, and looking forward to a new journey.

If you feel you are seriously lacking in any of these traits, explore ways to expand them to develop and nurture motivation in your life. One approach that can increase several of them is to learn to get into a state of flow. Read about that here: Being in a State of Flow – High Energy and Focused Productivity (carolbrusegar.com)

Develop, Nurture and Sustain Your Motivation

Now you may say, I don’t consistently have all these traits. What can I do to develop and nurture motivation ? Here are six ways to do that:

  1. Remember the pain points. If you feel your motivation waning in a particular area, keep in mind all the things that could or will happen if you don’t stay the course. For example, if you were once motivated to go running three times a week, think about what will happen if you don’t give your heart the exercise it needs.
  2. Don’t play leapfrog. Feelings of motivation can sometimes slip into the category of finding the next high. Instead of bouncing from goal to goal, make sure you finish what you start before getting motivated about something else. For example, if you really like language and made a goal for yourself to learn French, learn it before you switch to learning German, and then Italian, or whatever else.
  3. Know Thyself. When you try to accomplish goals that other people set for you, your motivation can wane. Take a look at your goals and make sure they’re goals you have for yourself…not goals that other people want you to achieve. If they’re not, you may want to set them aside and reassess where you’re going.
  4. Visualize. Picturing the end result of your goal can go a long way towards continuing your motivation to succeed, and it has some seriously awesome side effects. The positive energy you build around that imagery will affect you at a subconscious level, while the mental affirmation that you can achieve it will do loads for your self-confidence, which will also help you stay the course.
  5. Let go of stuff beyond your control. When it comes to motivation, it can be easy to give up because things don’t go according to plan. Learn to let go of things beyond your control; otherwise they’ll reduce your motivation to succeed. Letting go is a practice that can pay great dividends.
  6. Get organized. If you want to stay motivated, you need to work a little bit to keep the motivation alive, otherwise it will just slip into the traffic stream of life’s feelings that inevitably comes over everyone—just like happiness, sadness, or anger, motivation will just be another feeling unless you concretize it. The daily events and pressures of life have a way of drawing us away from things we want to do; so put your goals on the calendar and make an action plan.

To explore a unique approach to motivation, check out Susan Fowler’s book, Master Your Motivation, Three Scientific Truths for Achieving Your Goals  Drawing on the latest empirical research, the author proves that high-quality, optimal motivation is a skill that you can learn and apply.

I’m Carol Brusegar, author, photographer and curator of information. My focus is on gathering and writing on topics that enhance all our lives – regardless of our age. Topics include health and wellness, personal development, innovation and creativity, and a variety of helpful, practical tools and practices. I have a special interest in helping people over 50 years of age to create their 3rd Age – the next stage of their lives – to be the best it can be. Visit my Amazon Author Page to find my published books: https://amazon.com/author/carolbrusegar

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Feeling Stuck? At a Loss for Creative Ideas?

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Feeling Stuck?You’ve heard of writer’s block. But blocks aren’t unique to writers, artists and other creatives. Feeling stuck is something each of us experiences at times. It seems we can’t seem to come up with creative approaches to a situation we are facing. Even the most creative soul can struggle to find inspiration. Sometimes, this creative block strikes at the worst time. We desperately need to finish a project, but we can’t create. We are facing a situation that must be resolved quickly, but we can’t think of creative ways to approach it.  If this sounds like you, these tips may help you find your creative spark.

Start by taking a few minutes to practice mindfulness. Simply sit quietly, focus on the current moment. This can help you relax and clear your mind and consider which of these ideas to try first. Feeling stuck can change before you know it.

  1. Spend Time Just Having Fun

When you’re feeling stuck, it can be helpful to take a break from whatever you’re working on or pondering and do something you enjoy. This could be anything from playing a game, reading a book, or walking. The idea is to take your mind off the task at hand and allow yourself to relax and have fun.

  1. Always Be Ready

Inspiration can strike at any time, so it’s important to always be ready to capture your ideas when they come. Keep a notebook or journal with you at all times so you can jot down your thoughts as they occur. You can also use your phone to record voice memos or take pictures of things that inspire you.

  1. Take A Digital Detox

In today’s digital age, getting sucked into social media and losing track of time is easy. Taking a break from technology can help you clear your mind and refocus your energy. Consider turning off your phone for a few hours or taking a weekend off from social media to give your brain a break.

  1. Get Out Of The House

Sometimes, simply changing your environment can help get your creative juices flowing. Go for a walk in nature, visit a museum or gallery, or work from a coffee shop for a change of scenery.

  1. Forget About The End Outcome

It’s easy to get bogged down in perfectionism, especially when you feel creatively stuck. Instead of worrying about creating a perfect end product or solution, focus on simply generating ideas. Remember that rule of brainstorming: don’t judge ideas, just think of any possible thing. The more ideas the better. Open the flow. Set a five-minute timer and write down as many ideas as possible related to your project, situation or dilemma.

  1. Do Something Outside Your Comfort Zone

Trying something new or challenging yourself to step outside your comfort zone can be a great way to spark creativity. This could be taking a class on a new subject, trying a new hobby, or taking on a project that feels intimidating.

  1. Do Something Monotonous

Doing something monotonous, like washing dishes or folding laundry, can be a great way to get your creative juices flowing. These types of activities allow your mind to wander, which can lead to new ideas and inspiration and ends your feeling stuck.

  1. Make Self-Care A Priority

Taking care of yourself is crucial for maintaining creativity and avoiding burnout. Ensure you get enough sleep, eat well, and take breaks when needed. You might also consider incorporating activities like meditation, yoga, or exercise into your routine to help reduce stress and boost your energy levels. Having a personal wellness routine can be a powerful tool. Read more about it here: https://carolbrusegar.com/effective-wellness-routine/

  1. Set Better Boundaries

If you’re struggling with creative block due to too many demands on your time and energy, it might be time to set better boundaries. This could mean saying no to certain projects or commitments or delegating tasks to others. By managing your time and energy more effectively, you’ll be better equipped to stay creative.

Using strategies such as these can open up your creativity when you’ve hit a block. Learning more about how to approach any part of your life with more creativity will give great benefits. I wrote about creativity here: https://carolbrusegar.com/develop-your-creativity/

Here are a couple of books that you may find helpful:

Emotional Agility, Getting Unstuck, Embrace Change and Thrive in Work and Life

Anatomy of a Breakthrough – How to Get Unstuck When It Matters Most

I’m Carol Brusegar, author, photographer and curator of information. My focus is on gathering and writing on topics that enhance all our lives – regardless of our age. Topics include health and wellness, personal development, innovation and creativity, and a variety of helpful, practical tools and practices. I have a special interest in helping people over 50 years of age to create their 3rd Age – the next stage of their lives – to be the best it can be. Visit my Amazon Author Page to find my published books: https://amazon.com/author/carolbrusegar

 

 

 

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Create and Use Micro Habits to Help You Live the Life You Desire

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Micro HabitsDo you ever feel like your goals are unattainable, no matter how hard you try? Or that you can’t seem to make changes you desire to make your life work better? It could be because you’re overlooking one of the most powerful tools for your success: micro habits.

Micro habits are small changes that can have a huge impact on your life and help propel you towards achieving your goals. They may seem insignificant at first, but these tiny actions add up to create big results in the long run.

Why are Micro Habits a Powerful Tool?

Reason #1: Micro Habits Are Easier to Stick To

When it comes to forming habits, consistency is key. Creating a micro habit requires less of an effort than long-term goals, making it easier to stick with over time and turn into a lasting lifestyle change. Because they don’t take up a lot of time and energy, it’s easier to commit to them for the short and long term!

Reason #2: Micro Habits Measure Progress

Creating micro habits can help you stay on track and measure your progress. When you make small, incremental changes to your daily routine, it’s easier to see how far you’ve come and keep yourself motivated. And, if you use a habit tracker, you can create your own visual display of the progress you make along the way. It’s a great way to inspire continued action.

Reason #3: Micro Habits Build Momentum

Once you start forming micro habits and begin seeing the results, it will create a sense of momentum that will help propel you towards achieving your long-term goals. Many small micro habits can inform a bigger overarching goal.

Reason #4: Micro Habits Are Flexible

Because micro habits are small, they can be tailored to fit any lifestyle or schedule. This makes it easier for you to create the perfect micro habit for yourself and stick with it over time.

Reason #5 Micro Habits Increase Motivation

The feeling of accomplishment that comes with performing micro habits will help keep you motivated. When you’re able to see your progress and the results of your actions, it will give you the confidence to take on bigger goals. They help you build confidence one micro movement at a time. Micro habits give you an immediate win. You can start a micro habit in the next 5 minutes and get it done.

Reason #6: Micro Habits Reduce Stress

Creating micro habits can help reduce the stress that comes with trying to reach a big goal. By taking on smaller tasks and measuring your progress along the way, it can make achieving your long-term goals less overwhelming. You’re actually training your brain to react positively to new stimuli.

Examples of Micro Habits

These examples may help you identify micro habits that will enhance your life, whether in physical health, mental health, relationships, or any other area of life.

Read for 10 minutes a day.

Reading for 10 minutes a day can help you to improve your vocabulary, writing skills, and overall knowledge. What’s more is that it will give you a much-needed break from whatever else you were doing. The brain loves novelty as it keeps it sharp and agile.

Write in a journal for 5 minutes a day.

Writing in a journal for 5 minutes a day can help you to process your emotions, clear your mind, track your use of micro habits and other things and set goals. And, if you’re deep into writing, ignore the timer and keep going!

Meditate for 5 minutes a day.

Meditating for 5 minutes a day can help you to reduce stress, anxiety, and depression. It can also improve focus and concentration. To get started, find a quiet place to sit, close your eyes, and focus on your breath. Allow your thoughts to come and go. Don’t worry about it. Meditation is not about stopping your thoughts. It’s more about allowing and just being!

Exercise for 15 minutes a day.

Exercising for 15 minutes a day can improve your physical health, reduce stress, and boost your mood. You can exercise in the house or outside. You can exercise by lying down, sitting in a chair or standing up. There’s always something you can do.

Eat one healthy meal a day.

Eating at least one healthy meal a day can improve your overall health and help you to manage your weight. To get started, spend some time planning meals, create a shopping list and get what you need. Cook at home more often than eating out and avoid processed foods, sugary drinks, and excessive amounts of saturated and unhealthy fats.

Drink plenty of water.

Staying hydrated is vitally important to your overall health. After all, we are 70% water! Dehydration is not good for the body or brain and it can disrupt both from functioning properly. For tips to increase the amount of water you consume in enjoyable ways, check out https://carolbrusegar.com/stay-hydrated/

Take a walk outside for 10 minutes a day.

Getting outside and enjoying the fresh air for 10 minutes each day can improve your mood, reduce stress, and boost your immune system. Even if you can only walk back and forth in front of where you live for 10 minutes, do it! Moving your body and being outside will positively impact your life.

Call a friend or family member for 5-10 minutes a day.

Stay connected with friends and family by calling just one person each day for a short 5-10 minute conversation. It can improve your relationships, reduce stress, and boost your mood. Be sure to tell the person, up front, that you need to jump off after that time. You’ll be amazed at how refreshed you feel after connecting! And, the other person will appreciate you reaching out and connecting!

Be grateful for one thing each day.

Being grateful enhances our appreciation of life and our happiness. Each day, find something that you’re grateful for. Take just 5 minutes to either sit quietly and think about why you are grateful for that person or thing or consider journaling about it. When you do this, you’ll start seeing how much you truly have in life. Gratitude can completely change your relationship to everything in your life!

This is a brief introduction to the practice of micro habits; check out this book which has become extremely popular since it was published: Atomic Habits by James Clear It includes scientific and practical aspects of changing habits – “Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results.”

I’m Carol Brusegar, author, photographer and curator of information. My focus is on gathering and writing on topics that enhance all our lives – regardless of our age. Topics include health and wellness, personal development, innovation and creativity, and a variety of helpful, practical tools and practices. I have a special interest in helping people over 50 years of age to create their 3rd Age – the next stage of their lives – to be the best it can be. Visit my Amazon Author Page to find my published books: https://amazon.com/author/carolbrusegar

 

 

 

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Reclaiming Clarity in Turbulent Times

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INTRODUCING:

Clarity

“Clarity is alignment. Clarity is a clear impulse of where to go. Clarity is trusting the path.

Clarity is not standing in a wobbly place. Clarity is that momentum that has no resistance, 

and when you’re in that place of clarity, the feeling of what to do next is right there.” ~ Abraham Hicks 

Do you feel you have clarity right now about the direction of your life, your vision, your goals? For many of us the answer is no. I count myself as one. Why is that?

Put simply, we have experienced and continue to experience major upheavals and threats in our lives over the past few years. The combination of all of it has affected everyone somehow. As human beings, we have incredible ability to compartmentalize things or suppress our reactions or feelings. The are situations when this is useful for some period of time. But it is not the healthiest for us in the long run.

Quick View of Our Scenario

In the past few years, I have found clarity to be elusive. Perhaps you have too. When the COVID-19 pandemic hit, nothing was clear. As uncertainty and fear prevailed and our usual routines and connections were interrupted, a fog descended over so many of us. Our survival instincts kicked in and we figured out how to live in a totally different reality. We took things day by day. There wasn’t much else we could do.

As I look back, the greatest clarity I had during that time was when I had 6 weeks to prepare to move cross country in August/September of 2020. The imminent move, arranged by my daughter so I would be nearer to her and her family, forced me to focus on what had to be done to make this happen. I wrote about that here: https://carolbrusegar.com/reflections-on-pandemic-liminal-space/ 

Since the official pandemic crisis is past – although the virus still lurks and is infecting and killing people daily – we imagine we can be back to pre-pandemic life. But that’s not reality. For many of us our way of making a living has changed in some way. Our relationships may be different. We may be grieving loss of loved ones. We or loved ones may be grappling with the realities of long COVID. Our economy is still adjusting and recovering from the massive upheavals beginning in 2020.

And it’s more than the effects of the pandemic. Our political landscape has divided us in ways most of us haven’t experienced before. Changes that truly affect the daily lives of ourselves or people we know and love are occurring regularly. The ground is trembling beneath our feet.

Extreme weather events are affecting so many of us across the globe. Heat, cold, snowfall, rain and floods, wildfires out of control for months and smoke affecting people hundreds of miles away. The list could go on.

It’s not surprising that our brains are on overload and we feel scattered with all of these realities and more.

Greater Clarity

Lack of clarity manifests itself in many ways but we often don’t realize how that affects our lives. If we don’t know how something impacts us, we don’t address it. And sometimes we don’t realize what we are missing until we are reminded of it and its benefits.

When we realize why clarity is important, we are ready to identify our own status and take steps to gain greater clarity. Clarity and focus can vastly improve our lives.

The above is the introduction to my new Special Report, “Reclaiming Clarity in Turbulent Times.” The full report includes 8 benefits of finding clarity and then 12 signs that you lack clarity along with suggestions of how to make changes and additional resources. The free download of the report – no optin required –  is here: https://carolbrusegar.com/Reclaiming-Clarity-in-Turbulent-Times

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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The Danger of Toxic Positivity and Finding a Better Way

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“Look on the bright side.” “Put on a Happy Face” OR: “There’s no hope.” “We’re going down the tubes.” These extremes are prevalent these days. How do we deal with challenging situations both in our personal and collective lives? Some promote the always-positive approach – at the extreme, toxic positivity; others focus only on negatives.

Toxic Positivity

Positive thinking is usually a good thing. It can also be dangerous and toxic when taken to an extreme.

You may be asking questions like these. How can positivity be toxic? Can a positive person potentially poison themselves and others with a relentlessly upbeat outlook? How are you supposed to get over life’s many difficulties if you don’t adopt a positive attitude?

As with many things, toxic positivity is an extreme approach that includes no acceptance of painful or difficult experiences. Think positive! Keep going! No matter how our situation is, keep a positive mindset! Power through. Psychotherapist Babita Spinelli defines toxic positivity as:

“A belief that no matter how painful a situation is or how difficult, an individual should maintain positivity and change their outlook to be happy or grateful.”

What Toxic Positivity Can Look Like

We can find examples of toxic positivity within our collective experience of the COVID-19 pandemic. Even in the face of millions of worldwide deaths and a virus that seemed unstoppable, many people flaunted their toxic positivity. They refused to even entertain the idea that they would become victims. Videos were posted on social media of people gathering in the hundreds without wearing masks and social distancing.

Those people put themselves and their loved ones in danger because they ignore reality. They dismissed any negative emotions and responded to distress with an absolute refusal to accept that the world was presenting them with anything but the rosiest of pictures. The Psychology Group speaks of this relentless positive outlook as “… the dark side of the ‘positive vibes’ trend.” They define toxic positivity as:

“The excessive and ineffective overgeneralization of a happy, optimistic state across all situations. Toxic positivity leads to the denial, minimization, and invalidation of the authentic human emotional experience.”

Toxic Negativity

 In the midst of the pandemic we also saw attacks on public health experts who continued to study and update recommendations during this fast-spreading pandemic – and on those who were following the guidance. Toxic negativity polluted the dialogue and created great conflict. We became familiar with gaslighting too – the practice of causing someone to question their reality (Miriam Webster dictionary) by systematically feeding them false information.

Avoiding the Extremes

Toxic positivity can ruin relationships because the person presenting the “positive at all costs” mindset can be deemed insensitive or dismissive. A person can become ill-prepared for hard times when they fail to accept and deal with harsh reality. Toxic Negativity sucks the life out of a room or a relationship. Being critical of everything, assigning negative motivations or descriptions to everything the person disagrees with – it’s almost impossible to have a discussion with that person. There’s no room for finding positive solutions.

Somewhere in the middle is positive and realistic thinking. It can sound like “I/we can get out of here. I know this might look like a difficult situation right now, but if we use our heads and keep our wits, we can figure a way out.” We begin digging, climbing, and doing whatever we can to improve the situation. We think positively but not unrealistically. An approach that addresses the situation directly and right away is better than just having a seat and hoping for the best.

A combination of realistic responses to negative situations and a positive attitude that you can get through them is the recipe for success when dealing with life’s hardships. Adopt a positive outlook. Positive people have been proven to live longer than those who embrace negativity 24/7. Just be sure you don’t ignore negative feelings or life events.

In addition to this, protect yourself from people who exhibit toxic negativity. Limit your exposure to them. Set boundaries. Cut tirades short.

These two books provide much more information on this topic. Check them out.

Toxic Positivity, Keeping It Real in a World Obsessed With Being Happy by Whitney Goodman

Toxic Positivity, How to Be Yourself, Avoid Positive Thinking Traps, Master Difficult Situations, Control Negative emotions and Thoughts by Chase Hill

I’m Carol Brusegar, author, photographer and curator of information. My focus is on gathering and writing on topics that enhance all our lives – regardless of our age. Topics include health and wellness, personal development, innovation and creativity, and a variety of helpful, practical tools and practices. I have a special interest in helping people over 50 years of age to create their 3rd Age – the next stage of their lives – to be the best it can be. Visit my Amazon Author Page to find my published books: https://amazon.com/author/carolbrusegar

 

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Cultivating Curiosity to Enrich Your Life

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Curiosity, simply put, is “ the desire to learn or know about anything; inquisitiveness.” It’s a natural part of our humanity, from birth on. It can be discouraged or suppressed by parents and others in the quest to manage behavior. As adults, cultivating curiosity can be incredibly valuable to our lives. In fact:

 Curiosity is one of the most permanent and certain characteristics of a vigorous intellect.  ~ Samuel Johnson

Curiosity about life in all of its aspects, I think, is still the secret of great creative people.  ~ Leo Burnett

Curiosity opens us up to new people, places, and experiences. It can keep us feeling young and better prepared to deal with a changing world. I value my natural curiosity and try to continually nurture it. It has taken me down paths of understanding and learning and built bridges with other people. Curiosity is essential to understanding other people – especially those whose backgrounds and experiences are quite different from yours. It is a prerequisite to engaging our imagination and empathy also. Read more here: Imagination and Empathy – Tools to Decrease Division and Conflict .

These nine tips make cultivating curiosity in your life easier:

  1. Embrace The Unknown

Many of us fear the unknown, or at least have no interest in “digging deeper.” One of the best ways to cultivate your curiosity is to embrace the things you don’t know. If you take the time to learn about the things you don’t know, you will be surprised by some of the things you learn.

  1. Ask More Questions

Don’t be afraid to ask people more questions. This is not only one of the best ways to learn, but it’s also a great way to stay curious. When you ask the right questions (why, who, how) it will lead you down paths you never thought of before.

  1. Read More Often

If you aren’t an avid reader, strive to become one. Start small if you have to. Try to read a new book every month. You don’t have to focus on learning either. Quite often, a good fiction novel will capture your attention in unique ways that help foster curiosity. If you are a voracious reader, consider trying a new genre or seek out authors you haven’t yet explored.

  1. Stop Saying “I’m Bored”

Do you ever say “I’m bored” out loud? If so – next time catch yourself. Instead of saying you are bored, take in your surroundings and see if you can focus your attention on something else. Simply grabbing a pamphlet in a waiting room might inspire you in unexpected ways. Especially in those times when you have to wait in a doctor’s office, the Department of Motor Vehicles, etc., bring something to read or explore something new on your phone.

  1. Be More Present

Try to be more mindful of the world around you and your place in it. Instead of worrying about the future, fretting about the past, multitasking, or checking your phone – just let yourself be. When you are more aware of your surroundings, you will find yourself more curious about them. Rather than going into auto pilot when you are taking the same route to a place you go regularly, try an alternate route and observe as you go.

  1. Listen More Than You Speak

Listening to others is one of the best ways to spark your curiosity. You never know which tidbit is going to catch your attention and lead you down paths unknown. When you speak too much, you miss out on these types of opportunities.

  1. Learn Something New

Is there anything you have wanted to learn but never bothered?  There has never been a better time to learn about something new. With almost all universities and colleges offering online learning and websites like Udemy, there is no lack of ways to learn something new. And in-person classes at community colleges or community centers are a great option.

  1. Start Taking Notes

You would be surprised how much you notice about the world around you when you keep notes. Things you might notice in the moment, then normally forget later, can be captured forever by taking notes. Capture questions that pop into your mind too. Those can so easily be lost. Nothing beats an actual notebook, but there are plenty of phone apps that ensure you can jot down your thoughts anytime. Then go back regularly and explore some of those topics.

  1. Forget Your Fears

We let fear take control far too often. You won’t ever experience something new if you are too scared to take a chance. You may have apprehension about the activity itself, or of people’s reactions to you going in that direction. Worrying about the thoughts of others can be a huge and unnecessary block. If something interests you, go for it – don’t fear the judgment of others.

Here are 3 specific ways to get started cultivating curiosity today:

  • Think about a topic that you have a casual interest in but never really explored. Start an internet search about it, and dive in. Don’t worry if you go down another tangent – that’s curiosity!
  • Make a “to-read” list. Search an online bookstore and find some titles that speak to you or capture your interest. Try to find at least 12. This will give you a manageable list to conquer in a year.
  • Commit to learning something new. It can be a new skill or just a topic that interests you. Find an online course (there is probably a free or cheap option!) and sign up.

As you are cultivating curiosity in your life, you may find these books which go much deeper of interest:

 Curious: The Desire to Know and Why Your Future Depends On It

A Curious Mind: The Secret to a Bigger Life 

I’m Carol Brusegar, author, photographer and curator of information. My focus is on gathering and writing on topics that enhance all our lives – regardless of our age. Topics include health and wellness, personal development, innovation and creativity, and a variety of helpful, practical tools and practices. I have a special interest in helping people over 50 years of age to create their 3rd Age – the next stage of their lives – to be the best it can be. Visit my Amazon Author Page to find my published books: https://amazon.com/author/carolbrusegar

 

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TIPS TO GENERATE GREAT IDEAS

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Creative IdeasThinking ruts, brain fog, mental restrictions remaining from pandemic isolation….. Any of these can impede our ability find creative ideas and approaches to situations we face. Those situations are impacted by the multitude of things we are dealing with at this moment in history. We have information overload, deluge of media, dealing with the lasting effects of the pandemic, political stress and toxicity, our personal and family situations – and more. It can be really challenging to generate great ideas!

In all aspects of our lives, how can we manage all of this in ways that are healthy and productive? There are tools and strategies that can really help. We are far more creative than we often realize. Here are a few tips to help you generate great ideas in many areas of life.

SCAMPER

First, utilize the SCAMPER method. SCAMPER is an idea generation technique that utilizes action verbs to prompt creative ideas. It’s based on a belief that everything new is an alteration of something that already exists. It has been used effectively in business settings for decades and is also useful in our personal lives.

SUBSTITUTE – rename the challenge or issue to look at it differently, or modifying your attitude or feeling toward it. This can be as basic as seeing an opportunity versus a crisis. Or deciding to look for the positive aspects or potential outcomes.

COMBINE – link a situation or need to another and see new possibilities, or see a two-fer approach that will satisfy more than one thing. Most of us use this as a way to relieve time stress by combining multiple errands into one trip. How else can you apply it?

ADAPT – take an idea or approach you’ve used before or know of and readjust or revise it to fit the current situation. Think back to when you successfully met a need or solved a problem and adapt it to this situation.

MODIFY (or MAGNIFY) – change an approach by multiplying, strengthening or expanding it to meet this need.

PUT TO ANOTHER USE – apply an idea used in another context to this situation

ELIMINATE – see if there are things you are considering to be essential that really aren’t, or lessen their importance and see what emerges. Or simplify.

REVERSE (or REARRANGE) – see if you can put off or reorder something or reposition it in your life and priorities

For more about how to use SCAMPER, go here:   A Guide to the SCAMPER Technique for Design Thinking (designorate.com) The article focuses on business applications.

SHIFT PERSPECTIVE

It’s easy to get stuck in a particular way of viewing a situation or issue. It can be described as ‘having blinders’ to other perspectives or having ‘tunnel vision.’ Ask friends, family and acquaintances for their ideas about what you are facing. This can open you to new ways to think about it.

Another way to shift perspective is to play the ‘If I were’ game. This is simply putting yourself in the position of another person looking at your situation or putting yourself in another position. For example: If I were ____________ (a trusted person or expert), I would do this.

Or If I were 10 years older or younger/on easy street financially/in another state or country, etc., I would do this.

By trying these, you gain some distance from the dilemma and you may be surprised at the ideas that come to you.

MORE IDEAS = BETTER IDEAS

Generating great ideas is so often a numbers game. Sometimes you may get a great inspiration that’s just right without going through a lot of options. But more often, brainstorming as many ideas as possible will result in the best outcome. The key is to not filter or judge ideas that come to mind. Capture all the ideas you can and then assess them. You can generate even more great ideas by brainstorming with one or more other people.

KEEP TRACK OF YOUR IDEAS

Keep track of your ideas whether they are a result of brainstorming or those that come to you ‘out of the blue.’ Many great ideas come when we aren’t trying to generate them – in the shower, on a walk, in a dream, in the middle of a conversation. If you are anything like me, too many of the ideas that come to me this way are lost. I think I will remember, but often I don’t. Get into a habit of capturing these ideas – in a notebook, an electronic note page, a program like Evernote, or a specific Idea Journal. Check out this one: Idea Journal and Planner

For another set of ideas, check out this post: 5 Stages of Creative Thinking to Enhance Your Life.

Here’s a book that addresses the importance of the right mindset when trying to solve problems as well as giving tools. Solve It!: The Mindset and Tools of Smart Problem Solvers

I’m Carol Brusegar, author, photographer and curator of information. My focus is on gathering and writing on topics that enhance all our lives – regardless of our age. Topics include health and wellness, personal development, innovation and creativity, and a variety of helpful, practical tools and practices. I have a special interest in helping people over 50 years of age to create their 3rd Age – the next stage of their lives – to be the best it can be. Visit my Amazon Author Page to find my published books: https://amazon.com/author/carolbrusegar

 

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Imagination and Empathy – Tools to Decrease Division and Conflict

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Division and conflict over a wide variety of topics and issues are a reality of life these days in the U.S. and across the globe. It truly is like we see different realities. What’s happened? Why are we so unable to understand others’ situations and perspectives? Could things improve if we expand our ability to imagine and empathize with other’s situations and perspectives?

Author and clergyman Stephen Mattson makes a powerful statement about this:

“When you can’t imagine, you can’t empathize, understand, or relate with the actions, struggles, pain, suffering, persecution, and trials of others — you become apathetic, unmoved, stoic, and inactive….

When you can’t imagine, you can’t celebrate, appreciate, admire, and joyfully love others. You disconnect yourself from humanity.

Imagination leads to empathy, empathy leads to understanding, understanding leads to action, action leads to experience, and experience leads to wisdom — which leads to even more imagination.”

Imagining someone’s situation that is outside our personal experience with all our senses breaks down barriers. When you imagine what it is like for that person, what they are dealing with, you become more empathetic and understanding. And that opens doors to so much more.

Understanding Empathy

So what exactly is empathy? How is it different from sympathy? I found this compilation to be helpful:

“Sympathy and empathy are both related to feelings, but they have different meanings and expressions. Sympathy is feeling compassion, sorrow, or pity for the hardships that another person encounters, or a recognition of what they are going through. Empathy is putting yourself in the shoes of another, understanding and experiencing their emotions or situation from their perspective, or using your experience to relate to their experience. Empathy is usually preferred over sympathy when dealing with difficult situations, because people need to feel understood rather than pitied.” Summarized from 5 sources and the web, Bing Search engine

Imagination is important to empathy because it takes you beyond your own thoughts and experiences.  As we expand our ability to imagine and empathize, we open our minds and hearts to new things.

Let’s break down empathy a bit more. There are 3 different types of empathy – emotional, cognitive and compassionate empathy with problem solving. The last is actually a combination of the first two.

Here’s one way to describe the difference between the first two types –

“Cognitive empathy is an attempt to walk a mile in another person’s shoes, while emotional empathy is screaming in pain when someone else steps on a nail.” Source: MasterClass.com.

Emotional empathy most often occurs when someone experiences something you’ve been through before. You re-live that situation and its pain with that person. Even if you haven’t experienced the same thing but have a relationship with the person, emotional empathy is possible. That can be extended to others beyond your circle of friends who are dealing with similar things.

Cognitive empathy is a conscious effort to understand the perspective of someone else. You relate to what someone else is going through even if you’ve never experienced it yourself. You aren’t inserting your personal point of view. There’s no bias on your part and you’re not trying to insert your own experiences. You may happily help another person and might even understand the point of view of an individual. You don’t necessarily identify with what caused the problem in the first place but respond with empathy.

Compassionate Empathy combines the emotional and cognitive and goes farther. It means looking at a situation and trying to get at the cause. You analyze the underlying reasons why something happened, as well as the effects.

With this ability, you can demonstrate to a person that you understand where they’re coming from to the degree possible. You don’t offer any bias or prejudice. You may even offer an alternative way of thinking or some insight that helps the person in need.

Expanding Our Abilities and Impact

Empathy in any form makes the world a better place. It’s selfless and caring. It is also a powerful tool to apply in many situations in our fractured society and world. We are fortunate to have resources to help us expand our ability to imagine and empathize.

TED’s series “How to Be a Better Human” includes this article: 5 exercises to help you build more empathy | (ted.com) It includes 5 exercises to help build your empathy from Dr. Jamil Zaki, Psychology professor at Stanford University. Dr. Zaki believes we all have a responsibility to cultivate empathy in “the same way that we try to take care of our bodies or of our mental health…building empathy is a way to take care of our social health.”

I recommend Dr. Zaki’s book, The War for Kindness – Building Empathy in a Fractured World by Jamil Zaki

Another resource was written specifically for educators but provides so much great content for everyone. Preventing Polarization: 50 Strategies for Teaching Kids About Empathy, Politics, and Civic Responsibility  by Michelle Blanchet and Brian Deters

Each of us can make a difference if we make the choice and seek out the tools and opportunities to expand our ability to imagine and empathize.

I’m Carol Brusegar, author, photographer and curator of information. My focus is on gathering and writing on topics that enhance all our lives – regardless of our age. Topics include health and wellness, personal development, innovation and creativity, and a variety of helpful, practical tools and practices. I have a special interest in helping people over 50 years of age to create their 3rd Age – the next stage of their lives – to be the best it can be. Visit my Amazon Author Page to find my published books: https://amazon.com/author/carolbrusegar

 

 

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Do You Want To Be a Super Learner?

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lifelong learningWe all agree that things continue to change, and it seems at an accelerating pace. Keeping up with it all can be a challenge. Whether technology changes, health and wellness advice, the businesses and shops within our local area, or any number of additional things, new things are available to us all the time. To keep up, it’s almost like we need to be a Super Learner.

Sometimes it’s just so much, and we hear those voices saying ‘you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.’ But those are old tapes and they do us a disservice. In fact, some of the new things available to us are insights about and approaches to our lifelong ability to learn and grow. At every stage of life, we make choices about what is worth our time learning, based on what will benefit or enrich us most.

No, at this age I’m not interested in learning to skateboard or do mathematical calculations. There are other things that I am simply interested in learning about or learning to do and if I prioritize them and figure out how, I can learn them. Is that how you approach learning new things?

Thomas Oppong wrote an extremely helpful article, “6 Habits of Super Learners.” I think you may find them interesting and useful as you strive to be a Super Learner.

Oppong’s first habit: super learners read a lot. He says, “In a world where information is the new currency, reading is the best source of continuous learning, knowledge and acquiring more of that currency.” As an avid reader, I am delighted to see this as number one.  The hard part of this – the overwhelming amount of new information available every day. That’s why it’s helpful to be connected with networks and individuals who offer some recommendations that are pertinent to us. It may be an online group or website or people who share your values and interests. Where do you find that input?

Adopting a growth mindset is another of Oppong’s habits.  A growth mindset is the opposite of a fixed mindset and it allows us to be open, curious and always ready to learn. This is especially important as we age. It can be too easy to slip into a pattern of assessing possibilities in the framework of our past rather than future opportunities of thought and action. Dr. Carol Dweck’s book, Mindset, the New Psychology of Success, provides much valuable information about how we can have a growth mindset.  Importantly, her approach is broad. When she speaks of success, it is in any part or endeavor of life. I’ve written about mindset in more detail here: https://carolbrusegar.com/mindset-growth-or-fixed/

The final tip I will share from the article is that super learners teach others what they know. As the author states, “Teaching others what you know is one of the most effective ways to learn, remember and recall new information. Psychologists call it the ‘retrieval practice.’” I expect that many of us have had that experience, formally or informally. It is a process of both deepening our understanding and putting it into action.

Increasing our super learning habits and skills can pay off in many ways.  How about starting with deciding what you would like to learn and determine what you need to be and do to make that a reality?

3-Part Bucket List & JournalPerhaps you are not sure what you want to learn right now.  Here’s a way to get started – a 3-Part Bucket List and Journal. With this 3-Part Bucket List, you will divide your desires into three main categories: 1) things I want to learn about, 2) things I want to learn to do, and 3) things I want to do. In addition there are goal setting/planning sheets, journaling pages and doodling/sketching/mind mapping pages.

3-Part Bucket List & Journal

Thomas Oppong has a variety of books on Amazon, which you can find here:  https://amzn.to/39szzf7

Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol S. Dweck is available here: https://amzn.to/32H90A2

Each of us can be a super learner with a little effort!

I’m Carol Brusegar, author, photographer and curator of information. My focus is on gathering and writing on topics that enhance all our lives – regardless of our age. Topics include health and wellness, personal development, innovation and creativity, and a variety of helpful, practical tools and practices. I have a special interest in helping people over 50 years of age to create their 3rd Age – the next stage of their lives – to be the best it can be. Visit my Amazon Author Page to find my published books: https://amazon.com/author/carolbrusegar

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Creating Your Personal Vision Statement – A Step-by-Step Process

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Personal Vision Statement

A vision is not just a picture of what could be;

it is an appeal to our better selves, a call to become something more.

~ Rosabeth Moss Kanter

 As stated in the previous post, https://carolbrusegar.com/personal-vision-statement-part-1/ , this is a perfect time to create a new Personal Vision Statement. We are still experiencing the effects and after-effects of the pandemic. After all the interruptions and dislocations of the past few years, creating a fresh one can be an energizing process.

Before we get started on the step-by-step process for doing this, I urge you to go back to that post to review the benefits and examples of statements.

Your Personal Vision Statement will encompass your values, goals, and purpose in life. It may focus on the totality of your life moving forward, or you may want to create a statement that is for a particular segment of your life – like the next 10 years, the time while you have children living at home, your retirement years, etc.

Here we go. Be sure to have a supply of paper and pens to write with and be prepared to spread the process over some days to be most meaningful.

GOALS

  1. Brainstorm every single thing you’d like to do and to be in your life. No censoring. Take some time with it. Carry the list around with you for a few days and add to it whenever something crosses your mind. Keep going until you feel like it is completed.
  2. Do some culling of your list. Think through every item you wrote down. Is this something that you want in your heart of hearts? Or is it something you think you want? Or that you think you should want? Cross out the ones in the last 2 categories.
  3. What’s left is a list of things you really want in your life. Which ones do you most want to accomplish? Some of them are going to exert a stronger pull on you than others. Put a star beside these.
  4. Now look at compatibility of the items on your list. Some may be contradictory or can’t be accomplished together. There may be some painful choices here — which goals do you want most? Which are you willing to sacrifice in order to get to the others? Mark off the ones that don’t make the cut.
  5. When you’re done, copy the surviving goals down onto a clean sheet of paper. This is the beginning of your vision statement.

STRENGTHS, SKILLS, WEAKNESSES

The second step in creating your Personal Vision Statement is to make a list of your strengths and skills and decide how they relate to what you want to do with your life.

  1. Strengths. What are your strengths as a person? Write down everything you can think of. This is another brainstorming session. Don’t judge yourself and don’t hold back because of uncertainty or insecurity.

Are you strong (physically or psychologically)? Stubborn? Independent? Are you a freethinker? Are you good at helping people get along? Are you highly intelligent? Empathic? Incredibly organized? You have a list of strengths just like everyone else. Don’t stop with this list until you feel like you’ve covered them all.

2. Skills. List every skill you can think of that you have, in particular those that are related to the goals you identified in step one. What skills do you currently have that will help you get to those goals? How many of those are good to go and which need work?

  1. Assessment of strengths and skills needed to reach your goals/intentions. Grab another sheet of paper and go back to your final list of priority goals. What are the strengths a person who reaches each of those goals must possess? Take the goals one at a time and identify strengths needed.

Then make another list of the skills needed to accomplish these goals.

  1. Identification of weaknesses/things to work on to accomplish your goals. Compare the two lists you’ve create – the one of strengths and skills you already have versus those needed to accomplish all of these goals you want to achieve.

The differences between the two are your weaknesses. These are things you need to work on if you’re going to make all your goals a reality. Circle all these weaknesses.

 If you like, you can add working on or developing some or all of these weaknesses to your personal vision statement. You don’t have to do so, but still  keep the list handy because you will have to work on these things if you want to reach your goals.

VALUES

Take another sheet of paper and title it “My Values.” What’s the most important thing in the world to you? Your top priority, the thing you work so hard for, the one rule you always follow, the one guideline you use to define everything else in your life.

This may require some thought. Or maybe you know right away what it is. If so, you’re one of the lucky ones.

The answer, when you come up with it, might be simple or it might be complex. It might be the Golden Rule. It could be taking care of your family. Making money is a top value for some people while making a difference is most important to others. Some write a single word, such as “love” or “caring.” To have your vision statement be genuine, make sure your values reflect your innermost self. Dig deep.

Once you have an answer, you’re going to write down your second and third most important values. These might take you a while as well. You might even discover you have two or three on the same level. That’s okay too.

Now write down any other values you hold in high importance. Don’t write down too many; you don’t want to dilute the issue. You’re going to want to include your top value in your vision statement. Depending on your personality, you might want to do your second and third most important and maybe a few others as well.

Putting It All Together – Writing Your Personal Vision Statement

You have the raw materials from what you’ve been writing. It will all come together into a meaningful Personal Vision Statement with your attention and patience.

  1. Collect what you’ve arrived at on a new sheet of paper. Write down all the things that need to be included in your vision statement: write down your most important goals, any strengths or skills you want to include, and your personal values. These together form the basis of your vision statement.
  1. Have fun with this step. Allow yourself time – at least as much as you spent combined on the first three steps. Be as creative as possible. Create drafts of your vision statement by playing around with words. Start a sentence with any of the following phrases and write until you have incorporated everything you want to include. Remember, your vision statement may be anywhere from one sentence to a short paragraph long.

Vision Statement Opening Words

“I am…”

“I want…”

“My purpose/mission/vision is…”

“My life will show…”

“To…”

“I will…”

“I won’t…”

Try several of these and play around with them. Come up with four or five draft vision statements. Use active, first-person verbs in all of them. That means you should write as “I [verb]” as much as you can.

Make multiple drafts of vision statements that all start with the same opening words. Add things in and take out other things. Use synonyms and antonyms.

Try different lengths, sentence structures, pacing, and tones. Make drafts that sound as different as possible while still expressing the same core set of beliefs.

How Will You Know When You’re Finished?

How will you know when you’re finished? If you’re extraordinarily lucky or a talented wordsmith, you might be able to come up with the perfect vision statement just from these drafts. If not, keep working on drafts until you get tired of it or frustrated.

Set the task aside for a day or two, then come back and read your drafts again. Circle things that you really like. Mark out things you don’t. The bits and pieces that you like are going to form the core of your final draft.

Start making another set of drafts and this time use only the phrases you’ve circled from your first drafts. Then repeat the process until you’ve formed a personal vision statement that suits you. You’ll know when you’re finished.

Having and using a Personal Vision Statement to provide clarity and inspiration is truly worth the time and energy you put into it. It can result in a pivot in your life, or a clearer view of what you already sense about the direction of your life. Enjoy the process and the outcome!

I’m Carol Brusegar, author, photographer and curator of information. My focus is on gathering and writing on topics that enhance all our lives – regardless of our age. Topics include health and wellness, personal development, innovation and creativity, and a variety of helpful, practical tools and practices. I have a special interest in helping people over 50 years of age to create their 3rd Age – the next stage of their lives – to be the best it can be. 

Great Resource For You

Dennis Becker has a publication that can be of great assistance as you begin the process of living out your vision – Unlock Your Ideal Self. He says, “It’s not a magic button, it’s a journey. It’s a journey you’re going to be thrilled to embark on and it’s unlike anything you’ve ever experienced before. Imagine, in just a short time from now you could see some powerful, big changes in your life. Changes that will help you earn more, do better, and find what really makes you happy.” Check it out!